Or at least attempting to cut down.
After suffering my first ever panic attack last week, I’ve begun to seek ways I can help myself never EVER have one again.
There are other things I’m trying, but here I’m going to focus on trying to eliminate refined sugar from my diet to help balance my mood.
Since Sprog was born, I’ve eaten a hell of a lot of shit.
Coffee and cake are handed out like medicine to us weary mums at baby groups.
Then there are the zillion lunches I’ve tucked into while meeting other new mums.
Biscuits, cakes, paninis, chocolates, lattes, ice cream. You name it – I shove it in my gob all day, every day. And some days, if I’m really honest with myself, I double dip and have more sugary crap for dessert when husband gets home.
I’ve used all the excuses under the sun to ease the guilt. That it’s new to me, I never used to eat so much crap, of being a tired new mum, that I’m breastfeeding, that only a couple of months ago I shat a watermelon out my vagina. SEE! I deserve these treats.
WHAT A LOAD OF CRAP.
I’m not ‘treating’ myself, I’m fuelling a vicious cycle. If anything I deserve to be free of sugar, this horrific substance that’s often said to be more addictive than heroin.
Already bone tired thanks to Sprog, it’s obviously a genius idea to jump aboard the sugar rush roller coaster a couple of times a day.
I’ve only tentatively looked into the sugar free lifestyle and it’s petrifying just how much hidden sugar is in our daily foods. This means, cutting out sugar isn’t something that can be rushed into, I need to get some research done.
This means we’re going to take things week by week, slowly eliminating things, beginning with the main culprit for me, CAKE!
Importantly husband’s on board which makes things about 10 times easier. He’s interested to see how much this might change my mood (the poor sod often comes home to me frothing at the mouth, moaning about everything and anything!).
We didn’t do too badly today, onion and courgette omelette for breakfast instead of our usual porridge with honey* (let’s just say it resembles rice pudding there’s that much honey in it!).
Lunch consisted of a picnic style ham, cheese, olives, carrots and nuts. It’s at dinner where the wheels fell off. After a 10 mile walk along the Cotswold Way, we caved on the way home and smashed and grabbed at our local fish & chip shop.
Wahhhhhhhh! I managed it without any ketchup so I’m not beating myself up too much AND I turned down an ice cream from a van that had decided to park on top of our car at the end of our walk.